Being Called Into The BYU Singles Ward Bishopric

I'm not sure that I will ever bear my testimony again!

Bishop Shelley called this morning and asked me to go see the Stake President.  When I got up there I recognized a couple of the men in the ward.  Ideas started going through my mind; a calling to a position in one of the elder's quorums?  an assistant ward clerk?  what?

As I went in to talk with one of the counselors, the first question he asked me was, "Have you impressed your bishop?"  That seemed an odd question and I really couldn't answer it.  He then asked me what I was doing in The Church.  I told him that I presently did not have a calling in the ward.  He then asked me if I would serve as the second counselor in the Bishopric.  That question almost short-circuited my brain.  I didn't know what to say.  I felt most unworthy and inadequate.  I told the member of the Stake Presidency why I felt that way and requested a talk with Bishop Shelley.  We talked, he told me to see him after church.

That gave me the opportunity to go home and pray.  I cried and cried and I felt so inadequate.  I prayed for comfort and strength and peace of mind.  I prayed that the Lord would help me to accept the decisions made by his ordained leaders.

As I walked back to church I felt a feeling of peace come over me.  There had been a lot of doubts and reservations going through my mind.  All my bad actions, thoughts and deeds came to mind.  The prayer helped a great deal.

After sacrament I talked again with the Bishop and got things squared away for lots of work to come. I started the minute that I walked out of his office.  We counted up tithing, fast offerings, and budget then went and deposited them at the bank.  Rob was very helpful and gracious as he assisted me.

I then went back and talked to President Thompson.

What a day!  Up to the MTC after finishing my fast (one of the best I've had in a long time).  Problems with AU in the gym with all the Brazilian missionaries.

Valerie came down from Murray to visit.  She is a gem and I think I better keep an eye on her.

John got back from Idaho.  I missed him.  We shared experiences from our mission journals and laughed.  I do love him and will miss him greatly when he gets married.

I called Mom today.  She was depressed and in tears.  She feels at times that she has failed in raising her family in The Church.  I tried to comfort her.

A valiant woman.  I love her dearly.


JC

A Special Experience With Jeff Hafen

Jeff Hafen and I had a long talk today.  He bought me an ice-cream bar then we went to the custodian office and talked.  I was very frank in telling him about myself, my philosophies, and my sometime feelings of inferiority.  He reached out and touched me with his love and concern.

He told me of his father-in-law's father who had recently committed suicide.  Nobody in the immediate family was able to go into the room where the suicide took place to clean up.  Jeff was asked and responded.  He told me of the awful feelings of nausea that overcame him; how he was forced out of the room several times.  there was a lot of blood in the room and on the walls.  He told me of how, during this ordeal, the Spirit came to him reminding him of his baptismal covenants to mourn with those that mourn and comfort those who stand in need of comfort.  It was very touching.

He also told me of his feelings for me and how he saw in me some of Nephi's attributes.

I'm not sure that I have ever had an experience like that.  We knelt and prayed and I felt the Spirit very strongly.

I feel very weak and humble right now.

I got an A on my Stats test today which was sure a blessing.  I've been thinking about Anne a bit today.


JC