Johnny Ahlstrom got home today from New Jersey - engaged. He is happy and I think that he will be a little different from here on out. His heart and most of his brain are somewhere in N.J.
I had a very special experience this evening. We held a Bishop's court for R. The details were extensive and many transgressions involving chastity, word of wisdom and honesty were involved. In Bishop Shelley's experience it was the most compounded court that he had ever dealt with. After the initial part of the court, R was excused and we talked. My head was spinning. I didn't know what to think. Being the second counselor, the Bishop asked for my recommendation first. I didn't know what to say. He gave Brent and I more time to think. I was praying fervently that the Lord would make His will manifest to me.
At first I felt that disfellowshipment would be appropriate. I almost said that. Then, as I thought, I decided against that. I just felt that probation would be the right thing. I told the Bishop my decision. He tried to hide a smile that came over his face. I wasn't sure what that meant and it made me nervous but I felt good about my suggestion. Brent expressed the same desire. We then knelt in prayer and we felt the confirmation of the Spirit. The Bishop also felt that probation was the correct decision.
It was a special feeling of gratitude that came into my heart. The decision was unanimous and the Lord was able to make His will known to us.
I'm tired - mentally, spiritually, physically and emotionally!
JC
Showing posts with label feeling the spirit. Show all posts
Showing posts with label feeling the spirit. Show all posts
Wednesday, June 27, 1984
Tuesday, June 5, 1984
The Highs & The Lows Of Life
I guess one does change on life's waves make their impressions in the bedrock of youth. I used to have such problems staying in the library to study. It was especially difficult during the warm summer months. It still isn't easy but the discipline is gradually becoming more evident in my life. My, but what a struggle this life has been. How happy I have been at times and how low I have plunged. Sometimes life is so filled with activities that the excitement never seems to ebb. At other times the daily grind of things can approach a hypnotic state.
I took a tour through the MTC tonight. It was my Religion 130 class (Mission Prep). I felt the Spirit very strongly.
JC
I took a tour through the MTC tonight. It was my Religion 130 class (Mission Prep). I felt the Spirit very strongly.
JC
Monday, August 27, 1979
Baptizing In Six-Month-Old Green Water
I don't know exactly how but it seems as though I have been able to keep this journal up to date. It's P-Day today and we have been kind of cleaning up. Two elders are out visiting from Oruro. One of them is another Tongan.
Yesterday was really neat. The Mamanis were baptized and I got to do it. The Church is an ex-mosque and I don't know what it was that we baptized in but it held enough water. The water was about 6 months old and a weird shade of green. It was harder trying to remember their names than it was the prayer. That night after Sacrament we watched movies again. When we watched The First Vision I felt the spirit really strong.
I guess I have been chosen to lead the music. It is just like singing a solo. We don't have anyone who can play the piano and a lot of the songs the people don't know, but it is fine.
Last night I about froze to death. I was wearing my garments, long underwear, shirt, tie, sweatshirt, socks, and scarf and I still froze. It was really cold this morning. The wind was really blowing and we froze.
I have really enjoyed today. I just feel good.
Yesterday was really neat. The Mamanis were baptized and I got to do it. The Church is an ex-mosque and I don't know what it was that we baptized in but it held enough water. The water was about 6 months old and a weird shade of green. It was harder trying to remember their names than it was the prayer. That night after Sacrament we watched movies again. When we watched The First Vision I felt the spirit really strong.
I guess I have been chosen to lead the music. It is just like singing a solo. We don't have anyone who can play the piano and a lot of the songs the people don't know, but it is fine.
Last night I about froze to death. I was wearing my garments, long underwear, shirt, tie, sweatshirt, socks, and scarf and I still froze. It was really cold this morning. The wind was really blowing and we froze.
I have really enjoyed today. I just feel good.
Monday, August 20, 1979
Bolivia Bound: Thoughts From The Miami Airport
We are sitting in the Miami Airport. I think these lines are the same ones that I wrote two years ago in the same place while waiting to go to Argentina. Some eternal experiences have transpired in the last two days.
Sunday. Many compliments were paid to the Azul District. We averaged 80% on DMT, 9 out of 10 memorized all 8 discussions, and many commented on the love and examples that we have shown each other. That night we had a great culture class. Elder Harris and Elder Merrill really got us excited to go. Then, we went up to the temple and had a testimony meeting. I cannot describe the spirit that was there so I won't try. After the meeting we all gave each other abrazos. Everyone was crying, those abrazos were so neat. I just won't forget District Azul. It rained on the run back from the temple.
I felt like I was in a dream world on the bus to Salt Lake. The reality of 2 months has not sunk in. These two months in the MTC have been the fastest in my life. If I have had thoughts of being unprepared they are gone. Now is my time and I am ready.
Seeing Mom and Dad and Linda at the Airport really was a dream. It was so fast. Dad and Mom were fairly easy to comprehend but I haven't seen Linda for five months and I was just shocked at how good she looked to me. I just bumbled with my words. I don't think that I got one clear thing across, and that handshake with Linda just seemed insufficient. I guess one day I'll gain my reward haha. I talked with them a little about my experiences in the MTC and what they were doing. The time went just too fast. On the way up to the Airport I wrote my testimony in The Book of Mormon that I bought for Dad. The road was real bumpy and the handwriting was shaky but it was my testimony. I also was able to bear my testimony to all three in Spanish, it was neat for me and I think that they felt my spirit.
Well, on the plane to Denver I handed out my first pamphlet to a man who had his family with him. I was nervous as all get out. Elder Cowley who is in my traveling companion told me that I did a good job, that helped. Speaking of Elder Cowley, his grandfather's brother was Matthew Cowley. He is a real good missionary.
My second contact in the plane was real great. We were flying between Denver and Dallas. I sat next to a lady named Laura Wallace. We got a real good conversation going about Colorado, Trumbles in Boulder, sheep, Aspen, and many other things. We became fast friends when I gave her some of my Mom's toffee that she made for me. She raved and raved about it. Well the spirit was helping out and I got some inspiration. I told her that if she gave me her address I would have my Mom send her the recipe. That was the first address that I have received for a referral and I think that it was pretty smooth. We then got on the subject of families. I gave her Elder Cowley's tract on Family Home Evenings since I had given mine to the first family. She mentioned that she had the missionaries over before. I asked her what she thought of the Church. She told me that she thought the Church was a real good one and that she was extremely impressed with the youth. However she told me that she couldn't accept the Joseph Smith Story. I told her my feelings about Joseph Smith, bore my testimony of him and gave her the pamphlet on him. I aske her to read it again and pray. I told her also that I would send some missionaries again.
I felt so good doing all of this. She truly was a good lady. By this time the plan had landed. I took a big piece of the toffee and wrapped it in a napkin for her. I really think she was touched. We said our goodbyes and parted.
My third contact was probably the strangest. A lady who was from Cuba and returning on a vacation to Miami. She didn't speak very good English which gave me a chance to practice my Spanish. We introduced ourselves and I talked with her a little about Bolivia. She then kind of drifted off to sleep. We ate dinner and then she slept a little again. I had decided that she didn't want to hear about the Church. I think it was just that I didn't want to talk because the spirit was really working. It seems as if out of nowhere she just asked me what our Church believed. Well, I guess I realized that it wasn't me that should decide who to teach and who not to. I girded up my guts and got going. I presented the C-1 concept and C-2 to her in Spanish. I was really nervous. I hope that I didn't get her too confused. I told her that if she gave me her address, then some missionaries would be sent to tell her more. She did so gladly. She was really surprised with the story of Joseph Smith. Apparently she had never heard of him. I felt so insufficient with my ability to communicate.
It's 1:20 am and we just heard that our flight will be delayed until 4:00 this morning. That is going to be a while.
The variety of people here in this Airport is absolutely incredible. All races, colors and creeds are represented. Spanish is as commonly heard as English. There also is a diversity of morals and standards of attire. Some with sufficient, others insufficient. Well it is time to attempt some sleep. Before I do that, I will write just about my feelings right now.
I can just feel those precious missionary days just slipping through my fingers. Talking with the people is really a great experience. Every person is so different and so full of stories of their own life. I always hope that I can have this desire and love for the people. I think the love that I have felt for these people has come as part of my call. The last lady that I taught was a negro. The funny things was that distinction wasn't made until I saw her later in the airport. While I was teaching she was just another child of God to whom I should share my message.
Sunday. Many compliments were paid to the Azul District. We averaged 80% on DMT, 9 out of 10 memorized all 8 discussions, and many commented on the love and examples that we have shown each other. That night we had a great culture class. Elder Harris and Elder Merrill really got us excited to go. Then, we went up to the temple and had a testimony meeting. I cannot describe the spirit that was there so I won't try. After the meeting we all gave each other abrazos. Everyone was crying, those abrazos were so neat. I just won't forget District Azul. It rained on the run back from the temple.
I felt like I was in a dream world on the bus to Salt Lake. The reality of 2 months has not sunk in. These two months in the MTC have been the fastest in my life. If I have had thoughts of being unprepared they are gone. Now is my time and I am ready.
Seeing Mom and Dad and Linda at the Airport really was a dream. It was so fast. Dad and Mom were fairly easy to comprehend but I haven't seen Linda for five months and I was just shocked at how good she looked to me. I just bumbled with my words. I don't think that I got one clear thing across, and that handshake with Linda just seemed insufficient. I guess one day I'll gain my reward haha. I talked with them a little about my experiences in the MTC and what they were doing. The time went just too fast. On the way up to the Airport I wrote my testimony in The Book of Mormon that I bought for Dad. The road was real bumpy and the handwriting was shaky but it was my testimony. I also was able to bear my testimony to all three in Spanish, it was neat for me and I think that they felt my spirit.
Well, on the plane to Denver I handed out my first pamphlet to a man who had his family with him. I was nervous as all get out. Elder Cowley who is in my traveling companion told me that I did a good job, that helped. Speaking of Elder Cowley, his grandfather's brother was Matthew Cowley. He is a real good missionary.
My second contact in the plane was real great. We were flying between Denver and Dallas. I sat next to a lady named Laura Wallace. We got a real good conversation going about Colorado, Trumbles in Boulder, sheep, Aspen, and many other things. We became fast friends when I gave her some of my Mom's toffee that she made for me. She raved and raved about it. Well the spirit was helping out and I got some inspiration. I told her that if she gave me her address I would have my Mom send her the recipe. That was the first address that I have received for a referral and I think that it was pretty smooth. We then got on the subject of families. I gave her Elder Cowley's tract on Family Home Evenings since I had given mine to the first family. She mentioned that she had the missionaries over before. I asked her what she thought of the Church. She told me that she thought the Church was a real good one and that she was extremely impressed with the youth. However she told me that she couldn't accept the Joseph Smith Story. I told her my feelings about Joseph Smith, bore my testimony of him and gave her the pamphlet on him. I aske her to read it again and pray. I told her also that I would send some missionaries again.
I felt so good doing all of this. She truly was a good lady. By this time the plan had landed. I took a big piece of the toffee and wrapped it in a napkin for her. I really think she was touched. We said our goodbyes and parted.
My third contact was probably the strangest. A lady who was from Cuba and returning on a vacation to Miami. She didn't speak very good English which gave me a chance to practice my Spanish. We introduced ourselves and I talked with her a little about Bolivia. She then kind of drifted off to sleep. We ate dinner and then she slept a little again. I had decided that she didn't want to hear about the Church. I think it was just that I didn't want to talk because the spirit was really working. It seems as if out of nowhere she just asked me what our Church believed. Well, I guess I realized that it wasn't me that should decide who to teach and who not to. I girded up my guts and got going. I presented the C-1 concept and C-2 to her in Spanish. I was really nervous. I hope that I didn't get her too confused. I told her that if she gave me her address, then some missionaries would be sent to tell her more. She did so gladly. She was really surprised with the story of Joseph Smith. Apparently she had never heard of him. I felt so insufficient with my ability to communicate.
It's 1:20 am and we just heard that our flight will be delayed until 4:00 this morning. That is going to be a while.
The variety of people here in this Airport is absolutely incredible. All races, colors and creeds are represented. Spanish is as commonly heard as English. There also is a diversity of morals and standards of attire. Some with sufficient, others insufficient. Well it is time to attempt some sleep. Before I do that, I will write just about my feelings right now.
I can just feel those precious missionary days just slipping through my fingers. Talking with the people is really a great experience. Every person is so different and so full of stories of their own life. I always hope that I can have this desire and love for the people. I think the love that I have felt for these people has come as part of my call. The last lady that I taught was a negro. The funny things was that distinction wasn't made until I saw her later in the airport. While I was teaching she was just another child of God to whom I should share my message.
Thursday, July 26, 1979
Love & The Real Honest To Goodness Cookie Monster
I got a letter from Linda today. It was a pretty good one. I am getting a little worried about her though. It seems to me as though she is getting it cemented into her head and that I am the only one for her. I am afraid that I will have to write her a letter to try and shift her to a slower speed. It is scary dealing with a young lady's state of mind. Especially in these circumstances. I hope she will take what I have to say and not read in between the lines and think that some horrible change is coming over me. I really do love that redhead with the gap in her teeth!
Tonight in our branch meeting during the prelude music I felt really close to our Heavenly Father. There is a certain elder in our branch who has composed some beautiful music. I really had to struggle to hold back tears. I don't consider myself a crybaby in the least sense of the word but here at the MTC with the spirit that is here it is just impossible not to find yourself crying now and then.
The kind of love that I felt from my Heavenly Father tonight was very special. It wasn't the excited joyful feeling that you receive after working with all your might, doing what's right and succeeding. The love I felt tonight was the love of charity like the kind a boy feels from his father even after he has been slothful or done something wrong. I could say that it was love that accompanies our Heavenly Father's forgiveness. Even when we don't deserve it.
I know that the Lord loves us because I have felt that love. I think that I might even have a minuscule amount of it. At least at times, like when I think of telling my family goodbye, or looking at the elders in my district in the temple and wanting to hug the lot of them.
On a lighter note, it is really amazing to me to watch Elder Brown when I offer him one of my cookies. His face really lights up. He reminds me of a little kid at Christmas. I told him that and he even agreed with me. I think that I have found the real honest to goodness cookie monster!
Tonight in our branch meeting during the prelude music I felt really close to our Heavenly Father. There is a certain elder in our branch who has composed some beautiful music. I really had to struggle to hold back tears. I don't consider myself a crybaby in the least sense of the word but here at the MTC with the spirit that is here it is just impossible not to find yourself crying now and then.
The kind of love that I felt from my Heavenly Father tonight was very special. It wasn't the excited joyful feeling that you receive after working with all your might, doing what's right and succeeding. The love I felt tonight was the love of charity like the kind a boy feels from his father even after he has been slothful or done something wrong. I could say that it was love that accompanies our Heavenly Father's forgiveness. Even when we don't deserve it.
I know that the Lord loves us because I have felt that love. I think that I might even have a minuscule amount of it. At least at times, like when I think of telling my family goodbye, or looking at the elders in my district in the temple and wanting to hug the lot of them.
On a lighter note, it is really amazing to me to watch Elder Brown when I offer him one of my cookies. His face really lights up. He reminds me of a little kid at Christmas. I told him that and he even agreed with me. I think that I have found the real honest to goodness cookie monster!
Sunday, July 22, 1979
The Foot Race Talk: "A Proud Grandson"
I am truly on a spiritual high today. My day didn't start out in a very promising way. Our door was "pennyed" so that we couldn't get out. We also didn't wake up until 6:45 which was real late. However those were perhaps the only things that went wrong with my day.
I gave my talk on the importance of journals. For perhaps the first time in my life I have prayed for inspiration on a talk and then exercised the faith to receive it. I had an entry to read out of my journal (my foot race). I thought that it would be of some inspiration to someone. However I didn't quite know how to read it without feeling as though I was bragging.
We came to the meeting and just before we walked into the room I received the inspiration on how to do it. I treated my journal as if it had been my Grandfather's. I pretended that I found it, then I read the part as though I was a proud grandson reading about his Grandfather's mission experiences. I felt the spirit with me when I read it so I read with confidence and emotion. I think it was well received. I got a lot of compliments from the elders in my district on the talk. I felt totally unworthy of the praise because I know that Heavenly Father provided the inspiration for the talk and the spirit was there while I was giving it. There is no way that it could have gone wrong.
In our culture class I learned a great deal. Our instructor Elder Reed Harris talked to us on the importance of having charity for the people in Bolivia. I came out of class with a new feeling towards that word. The spirit again was in that class and it taught me a great deal. I felt so good. We then went to family home evening. I felt the spirit there again and very strongly. All the contributions of them members of my district fell upon my heart.
I was finding (with directions by the spirit) things in both The Book of Mormon and New Testament that worked right into the lesson. Tonight I felt love for my district, true love. I wanted to hug the sisters like I could the elders but just had to settle for a good handshake.
To top off the night, Elder Brown and I had a real good companionship inventory. We talked more freely than ever before. It is now 10:30 and time for bed. I wish I could write more but it is a rule. I can't wait to pray!
I gave my talk on the importance of journals. For perhaps the first time in my life I have prayed for inspiration on a talk and then exercised the faith to receive it. I had an entry to read out of my journal (my foot race). I thought that it would be of some inspiration to someone. However I didn't quite know how to read it without feeling as though I was bragging.
We came to the meeting and just before we walked into the room I received the inspiration on how to do it. I treated my journal as if it had been my Grandfather's. I pretended that I found it, then I read the part as though I was a proud grandson reading about his Grandfather's mission experiences. I felt the spirit with me when I read it so I read with confidence and emotion. I think it was well received. I got a lot of compliments from the elders in my district on the talk. I felt totally unworthy of the praise because I know that Heavenly Father provided the inspiration for the talk and the spirit was there while I was giving it. There is no way that it could have gone wrong.
In our culture class I learned a great deal. Our instructor Elder Reed Harris talked to us on the importance of having charity for the people in Bolivia. I came out of class with a new feeling towards that word. The spirit again was in that class and it taught me a great deal. I felt so good. We then went to family home evening. I felt the spirit there again and very strongly. All the contributions of them members of my district fell upon my heart.
I was finding (with directions by the spirit) things in both The Book of Mormon and New Testament that worked right into the lesson. Tonight I felt love for my district, true love. I wanted to hug the sisters like I could the elders but just had to settle for a good handshake.
To top off the night, Elder Brown and I had a real good companionship inventory. We talked more freely than ever before. It is now 10:30 and time for bed. I wish I could write more but it is a rule. I can't wait to pray!
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